Oct. 11th, 2004

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That was an interesting exercise I guess, it was nice to get to talk about me for once without having to feel like I was dumping on anyone or having to defend anyone...I'd forgotten how good it was to just vent and have people listen, whether or not they actually think I have a problem or give care or whatever in the way they thought I don't know - I think that's why I was so nervous to begin with, it doesn't matter how much you get told that there's no right or wrong answers you always feel like there should be.
They gave me a booklet thingie about coping with caring which I've skimmed and will read more later, it's informative if nothing else and has lots of web sites and phone numbers, Jane is also going to throw lots more sites and things at me and give me the contact details of a couple of groups which will be nice, means I can actually get to talk to other people who understand and won't expect anything of me. I need to talk more, ok so I've always known that I need to talk more but it seems like I'm finally getting the hang of doing it.

*yawns* I am so bloody tired, I don't want to nap, I hate sleeping in the middle of the day and I can't just catnap like Paul - guess it has something to do with the random insomnia last night then waking up at stupid hours because I know I have to get up, now why can't my body do that normally?! The getting up part that is not the not sleeping. I'm also bored out of my mind, there's no one around, all quiet in cyberland and I can't seem to settle to do anything, I wouldn't mind going shopping even if it's only window shopping at the moment but again, don't really fancy going out on my own. I need to call Jackie and arrange meeting up but I know her and Bill are wanting some alone time...although he's working today (or I think he is anyway) so calling her might be a plan ... then again if she's on her own ... which she won't be 'cos Chelle and Kira will probably be there if nothing else ... never mind. I'll stop rambling and go call her, even random phone chats are better than talking to myself lots :-P

*pixie dust*
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Huh, well that was a great idea while it lasted...bloody orange answerphone woman!

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